We are two weeks into a seven week series on the Song of Solomon in our Sunday services, and my goal has been to both communicate the message of this unique book (or collection of love songs) and to use it as a springboard to communicate the Biblical view on love, sex, and marriage.  There are so many harmful messages out there on all three of those topics that I believe have contributed to a culture that is littered with broken marriages, aborted children, rampant pornography, and general chaos in the romantic realm.  As difficult as it can be to preach on these topics in church, I strongly believe that it would be worse to remain silent and hope that people can sift through the cultural messages on their own.

Having said that, I am trying very hard to preach on these topics with wisdom and sensitivity.  The Song of Solomon is full of metaphors and imagery that may or may not be saying what we think they are saying [i.e. “Your stature is like that of the palm, and your breasts like clusters of fruit. I said, “I will climb the palm tree; I will take hold of its fruit” (Song of Solomon 7:7-8); “Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest is my lover among the young men. I delight to sit in his shade, and his fruit is sweet to my taste” (Song of Solomon 2:3)], and it is not necessarily fruitful (no pun intended) to dwell on each picture.  I have found that this book destroys the notion that sex was designed by God solely for procreation, instead teaching that it is a good gift given by God, meant to be enjoyed like a fine wine by a husband and wife.  But of course, there is so much more to marriage and love than sex:  there is communication, companionship, serving each other, serving God together, refining each other into Christlikeness, and most importantly, living out the gospel of grace in how a couple loves, forgives, and serves each other.  And so my hope is that over the next few weeks, I will be able to correct some of the false teaching that is out there on not just sex, but marriage and love in general.

One of the other challenges for me through this process has been to check my motives, because in our culture, sex sells, and a church talking about sex is a great marketing strategy that can often increase church attendance.  Let me give a few examples I have seen.  One organization, xxxchurch.com, which ministers to those trapped in pornography, came up with “National Porn Sunday,” where churches can spend that Sunday combating the false teaching in that area and replacing it with teaching on the beauty of purity.  And every year, the papers will do an article on churches who decide to join xxxchurch in their crusade.

Increasingly, there are more and more examples of churches that don’t just teach on sex but turn it into a marketing strategy.  Recently, there were two prominent churches who made news for putting out sex challenges to the married couples in their congregation.  Ed Young, the influential pastor of the megachurch Fellowship Church of Grapevine, Texas, did a “7-day sex challenge” last November in which married couples were challenged to have sex every day for that week as part of the series he was preaching (that’s Young below, and yes, he is preaching from a bed).  And, of course, the press ate it up, as Young made the rounds of national morning shows and even the Stephen Colbert show talking about the challenge. 

Another church, Relevant Church in Ybor City, Florida, did Fellowship Church one better last February, challenging its members to a 30-day sex challenge, complete with daily devotional on how to better love your spouse (inside and outside the bedroom).  Again, the result was controversy, media coverage, and increased church attendance.

And as I have previously written about, there have been churches that have bought billboards to advertise their sex series, created whole websites to promote their series, and sent out mailings to the community.  This past month, a Wisconsin church called Great Lakes Church was actually KICKED OUT of the elementary school in which they met because so many parents complained to the school after receiving fliers from this church promoting their sex series (you can read the Kenosha News account here).  And once again, the results were the same:  controversy, media coverage, and increased church attendance.

What is my point?  A careful survey of the evangelical church landscape would reveal that the quickest way to grow your church is to plan a sermon series on sex, find a provocative way of marketing it, and then say yes to every media request that comes your way.  In the process, you will further alienate and anger some people, while attracting many other people who are curious to hear what you have to say.  And, in the end, your church will grow.

But will God be glorified?

For what it’s worth, I believe that sex is an important part of marriage, that our culture has a warped view of it, and that it is critical to correct harmful teaching from the pulpit with the truth of God’s Word.  However, as I mentioned earlier, sex is only one component among many that contributes to a healthy, God-honoring relationship.  This is why I plan on devoting one week of this seven-week series to discussing the Biblical view on sex and purity, while spending the other weeks discussing all the other aspects that make for a God-honoring relationship.  And that is also why I am fairly confident I would never take the route of preaching a whole sermon series on sex (let alone issuing a sex challenge to my congregation).  Just because marketers have discovered that sex sells does not mean that the church has to place its trust in the idol of sex in the pursuit of another idol, church growth.  

Thoughts?  Comments?  I’d be interested to hear what you have to say.

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